Initial Attraction to Eventual Subtraction = My own version
of Perfection
She met him at sunset, ‘twas a fancy restaurant.
She was dressed to kill. Perfect curls, immaculate nails,
subtle make up which highlighted her cheek bones. A fresh fruity perfume filled
the air, as she walked towards him with grace and flair. Two inch heels, just right
to match his height, not too tall - not too short; Oh yes! She was just right!
He was uber cool. Casual khakis with a sky blue linen shirt.
A button seemed to have (deliberately?) opened, revealing a hint of his
masculine chest. The brown moccasins completed his look with an air of unrehearsed
confidence. He wore a sharp crew cut which sat on a square chiseled face. A strong
woody scent complimented his lean body. Oh yeah! He was one of a kind, not just
anybody.
He opened the doors, pulled the chairs, gently their hands brushed
as they walked. He held her gaze as they shared and talked. She tossed her hair
as she spoke. He listened with intent. Laughed at all her jokes. She made him
feel special, when to his name she’d refer. She’d tilt her face as she looked into
his eyes, only to coyly look away soon after.
In that moment, stars they saw. There was a chemistry which
was heavenly, together forever, he saw. Do you, he intently asked? I do, she replied
fast.Over the years they got to know each other better. She was a natural nurturer, he a hard worker. As she went about her daily chores, her hair was anything but perfect. Her locks were often wrapped in a bun of neglect. Her perfect curls came at $45, the perfect figure required a corset to survive. Occasionally she suffered from…ummm flatulence. Yet, she was cute in her most awkward instance too. In her imperfections there was an allowance of comfort, a mutual acceptance.
He worked long hours, tired, some nights he snored. He’d be fast asleep just when she was wide awake and bored. He’d watch sports on his off days, she’d plead to go out that day. Eventually they’d settle to watch some Netflix or Nat Geo. There was nothing woody about his scent then, only a request to please wear deo. Always; he’d burp after his meals; Disgusting! She’d say. Yet she’d cook up his favorite meal just to watch him blissfully belch as she’d squirm and squeal.
Akin to each other’s skin, their love only grew. Together; they created a beautiful reality, minus the formality. It was their own version of perfection, a level of trust and affection. In there, there was no room for any adulteration.
Notes from my desk: While the above sounds ideal, countless couples
complain of losing the “spark” in their relationship. Some chalk it up to
evolved differences, a slow growing apart, or sheer familiarity. Undoubtedly, the
initial honeymoon stage of a relationship does fade in order to
form a bond that is deeper and more intimate as the two become closer and
intertwine their lives together. That wave of stagnancy and deadness can often submerge
a relationship after the first thrilling months or years. As a result, many
couples lose hope, break up or even look elsewhere for the excitement of
newfound intimacy.
The question then is; ‘Is love really blind?’ A recent survey tells us that
the connection between caring for our physical appearance and the health of
romantic relationships is actually stronger than we realize. Research showed
that looks do play a clear role in long-term partner satisfaction. According to
the survey, overall physical attractiveness, which is not the same as physical
perfection, matters to both men and women.
In conclusion; keeping the focus on the value system of the relationship is
ideal. Trust, faith, loyalty alongside a healthy paradigm of open communication
is vital. However a long term relationship doesn’t mean that you’re
doomed to watch the spark fade away. You just need to make the effort to rekindle
it. Take the time to revive, refresh and renew. Your effort is the oxygen that
will breathe life into your love again. A little today, some more every day.
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